HOME INVASIONS

I was checking out the news and they were talking about how there has been a lot of home invasions in the city and they gave out this website to help prevent home invasions. I took a look at these and they are decent but I think I could make improvements to these so here they are. (The site is Home Invasion)




Some simple things you can do to prevent home invasions.
When you are at home:

Do not confront intruders (Without your shotgun)

Do not open doors until you are satisfied that it is safe to do so (and you are prepared to kick someone in the balls till they bleed)

Answer "I'll get it" even if you live alone or are the only one at home (Answer “That’s where I put my flamethrower)

Teach children to never answer or open a door without an adult at the door with them (Or just give them a sword)
In and around your home:

Do not use door chains. Use strong devices that allow you to open the door a couple of inches (Put a shotgun in your house that shoots threw the door every 5 minutes. If people still want to go in your house they deserve the stuff they steal)

Reinforce door frames and all doors (With a mild explosive device)

Use a security alarm, personal panic alarm and intercom systems (Best security system is a well trained wolf in the front yard. And by well trained I mean bloodthirsty)


Those are some very easy ways to protect your home, and if you think they are inhumane have fun getting raped because of your crappy wuss ass security system.


Okay people go forth and protect your home and go to HUMOR-BLOGS.COM because you know i am right

WEIRD NEWS

Ok you know what time it is NEWS THAT IS WEIRD


Questionable Judgments: Dr. Frederick Lobati, 47, was charged last year with felony abuse of his daughter in Ozark, Mo., but in June 2008 offered the defense that, being of African heritage, he was merely applying a "konk" (a bare-knuckle punch), which is an acceptable punishment in his culture. [Springfield News-Leader, 6-24-08]



I like this guy I mean its part of his culture and in my culture it’s an accurate punishment to continually kick the neighbor kid in the balls because he wont shut up. I mean come one who wants to listen to a kid screaming because he wanted three scoops of ice cream instead of two. Now why kick the kid in the balls it’s just going to make him cry and scream more. Yes but it would be funny and do it enough times and he will be infertile thus stopping the cycle of pains in my ass kids.


Okay crotch kicking people go the world go to HUMOR-BLOGS.COM okand give me a smile because you know I am right.

WE KNOW ITS FAKE

Why do people need to get these fake ass tans?

I mean do they think “Huh how can I look like a cheap whore and a superficial bitch”

I wouldn’t mind the fake tans if they made the girl look I’m not sure HOT. I think the point of a tan is to make you look good and a real tan give you cancer but it doesn’t matter just as long as you look kick ass.

What ever happened to people getting real tans huh? Going outside and playing with some sort of person or an animal or doing yard work or just laying in the grass. NOOOOOO!!!!!!! Girls would rather put orange butter on them and call it a tan.


I say this to the people of the world mostly girls but the random gay guy GO THE HELL OUTSIDE AND GET A NATRUAL TAN BECAUSE YOU LOOK LIKE ORANGE SHIT.


Girls of the world you have just seen the truth so now go to HUMOR-BLOGS.COM ok
and give me a smile because you know i am right.

Immigration

Yes the problem with this country is the fact that we have no real border patrol to stop these illegal immigrants from getting in the country. But I have a few ideas.


Idea 1.

Part a. Build an electrical fence and put I don’t know about one million volts into that bad boy.

Part b. You might be asking “what about those that swims across the border?” Well part a is the answer just put that fence right there in the water and I dare anyone or anything get across our border now.

The government is just to much a of a wuss to use real change for the risk of “killing innocent people” Oh who cares







Idea 2.


Build a river a freedom river which will disconnect us from Mexico and in the river just put a few thousand sea mines in there and problem solved



Someone survives that they belong in America




Idea 3.

Last idea we line the border with are secret army of soldiers and just let them do there work


Now we must put this plan in action because I am right.

News of the weird

Came across this site www.newsoftheweird.com and thought i would post one of these news of the weird stories every once in awhile and tell you what you should think about them



So the first NEWS OF THE WEIRD


One Obsessive American
Sam Bloomfield, 58, grew up poor on Tonga but arrived here in 1976 and says he has tried to show his gratitude ever since, according to a July 4 profile in his hometown Herald of Everett, Wash. He has tattooed "God Bless America" under his left eye, "Land of the Free" under his right eye and a large "USA" across his forehead, and last year underwent another 15 painful hours with the needle to cover the rest of his face with stars and stripes resembling an American flag so that he can toast his beloved country in the mirror every morning. [Seattle Post-Intelligencer-Everett Herald, 7-4-08]

I used to think that people forgot to be happy they could live in this great country. Well people do not know how good they have it but this guy understands it and shows his gratitude. I will now consider showing my gratitude to porn by getting two naked ladies tattooed on my face one on each cheek.


Now learn from this that you are wrong unless you agree with me